Learning to live on rocket fuel

What is happening? Despair, that is the inevitable consequence of genetic decay. We're down to a quarter life now. And I'm somehow worst of all, a trough under the heavy bottom. Our children will curse our name? Yeah, maybe. That's what I'm thinking about. And irradiation. And hot things and things that give off things that Geiger detectors detect that make everything cancerous in a few days. "Sheer exhaustion", finally, what death comes from, what a horrific phrase. . Cc. ., ., .., ..., . Z z - z y

I had to put the book down, "on the beach", it was too disturbing. And not in the way that an apocalypse dramatization normally is. In a quieter more insidious more real way, like not a sanaTIZED mass death, but rather dreary sanity intersecting that death, made somehow sharper when people are trying to milk their last months racing sports cars in dangerous and deadly rallies and there's a little humour in it, but a kind of cold British type that's delivered without a smile.

It hasn't all caught up to me yet. But actually, at least locally, the amount of stuff that has to catch up is decreasing logarithmically. And look what I've already got over! This is nothing compared to that!