24 Jul 2006


Keep on. Keep on your neglect. Your ignorance.

Keep me away from the drink. And I'll keep my dignity.

I can keep on like this. I can keep my dendrites cold. So cold, there's no need for revenge.

There's always dreams, extremes of ego distortion. Was hanging with Omar and Cedric today. The summer haze of the dream dayshift. Cedric broke my monitor, tried to fix it. I have dignity in dreams. I'm not a fanboy. I offered them drinks, but I told them I was too tired to party that night. Told them I wouldn't know where to go anyway.

There's silver linings. Like my resolve to leave only strengthens.

When the paradigm shifts, it's best not to cling to the old ways, the old, unsustainable ways. I could learn to love the unlucky star, the fallen angel. The rogue star. There's a new homeworld for me. Outside this galaxy of social entropy.


nobody said...

I like the painting- yours?

Hector the Crow said...

I like it too. It's not mine though. Found it on a google image search when looking up "unstern" (German word for "unlucky star"). Franz Liszt wrote a piece of music with that title which sounds exactly like how I often feel. Very hard to find a recording of it though.

Tasha Klein said...

drinking sucks. i hate it. the painting captures the self loathing well.

*fanboy*.. that's good.


Maybe I do wanna be a sucker. Maybe it's better than a pointless sense of superiority. Miserable sense. Maybe better to get suckered in ...