2/28/10

Some Other World Convention

Conventions. Webster’s dictionary defines “conventions” as the plural of convention. It’s the First Annual Montgomery Burns Award for Outstanding Achievement in the Field of Excellence. What was I gonna say? Something about selling out. Get to the bloody point, man.

Societal conventions. I used to watch David Bronson or Broadside or Brawnstein or Whatever’s “dating” phoneline infomercial on CTV, every night at 3 am, on my little fuzzy TV in my bedroom, because it was on, on my own TV in my bedroom, even if it was shitty reception. It was that or CBC, and if there was no good foreign film on, or at least one with nudity, I would watch whatever was on CTV. The Dating thing had a lot of clubbers showing skin, up to, but not including, genitals. The females, that is. They seemed like adults to me, then. After interludes of aggressively non-hip music in some middle-american dance-club purgatory, they would cut to video personal ads. One of them was a tall blonde. “My name is Sharon, I’m 28. I know, I’m old. I’m looking for...”

Oh forget it. Can’t recall what insight was so profound I had to write it in essay form. I just have to end this downtrodden day with a few words, some verbal defiance. I’m edgy in the burbs. Micromanaged. Waiting for my ship to come in. I’ve set the bar lower for a homeworld. The last world would do. Oh, this oh so earnest striving for starched collar mediocrity.

Can’t wait for the night to fall. Things will be better, I’ll be alone to work on my album. Still, can’t remember ever feeling this soulless. Even when burned out, drugged out, and defeated, there was soul implied by the void. Now I’m staying clean, running a rat-maze with no discernible exit in job hunting limbo, hoping to bootstrap myself out of this rut after i’m hired by the hundredth employer, the one who values something other than bullshit, so I can raise enough capital to, I dunno. Jobs come in three flavours, the nine-fifty, the ten-fifty, and the ten. I don’t like the curve that implies. No wonder I feel whatever this is.

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