chords occurred to me one playthrough night - turned into a cold shiver that wasn't cold enough to warm me as the psychothermic waves did in the past - there were stupid waves and also waves of righteousness, sometimes cresting into each other, making me joyous and queasy, if i can be permitted to use that j-word
and now what am i going to do? it's like, writing used to be a labyrinth with more spaces than walls, now there's more walls than spaces - at least there's a few hours to fritter away before i have to go to a big school building and be in a class room - time to dream, if i want to, and make waking up all the worse - maybe i should stay awake, but now the thought is making me sleepy - i'd love to dream, even the nightmare last night that left me sweaty seems neat now, but i'm neatly able to delude myself now, it's a built in mind mechanism to prep me for the schizoid plunge, a siren song sort of delusion - me and my relationship partner, we never mixed with these words, this expressive venue - why can't there be a better mix? is that a law of nature? sad that i think i need caffeine to complete this all-nighter - it won't be that - but it won't be in code either - so, let's say, that's a victory, for something - for sus 4 chords
it would be fun to go full-bore hermetic, an idle hypothesis insists: a substitute for absence - a substantial absence
okay, let's make some space
between the silly album and the rest of life
keep the tracks in the historical subfolder
of the recording folder on H:
as a digital time-capsule
to be opened in five years
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