Barbie evolved into Malibu Stacy. Malibu Stacy evolved into Lisa Lionheart. That's not nothing, that's an upgrade. Forgetting your troubles with a big bowl of strawberry ice cream turned into platitudes about believing in yourself and you can achieve anything. Conviction became a convict, chained cultist to the god of Belief. Lisa Lionheart became Ashley II, played by Miley Cyrus. That's not nothing. It's not Coke 2. But it's certainly not Coca Cola Classic. It has no real cocaine in it. It's just a cola. Not even a Pina Colada, no tequila, nothing but cola.

Winter's coming. Such as it is, anymore. These days, these crazy days. The yield curve is looking bad. I feel fine, but R.E.M. is not my jam, not at this time. All the wrong people die. I want to see more Epsteins, a scummy life reduced to an encouraged suicide, die shrieking, never understanding anything except a self-justifying warped morality. A few thousand of those is not too much to ask for. There's honour in sepuku. Do it, and don't give your money to your kids. We'll come for them if you try.

Achieve anything. That's your trophy. For achieving so hard, over-achieving, even - see the sullen derivative bass player? She's doing nothing new, achieving nothing. But in the future, everyone is over-achieving. Everybody learned to code. Everybody got a trophy. They're worth nothing, we need desalinated water, can't buy it with bitcoin or trophies.

References: zelda theme [koji kondo], crimson and clover [tommy james and the shondells], eriatarka [the mars volta], stonecutters episode [the simpsons], part of your world [the little mermaid]