mute rootcellar

Planning on fifteen R30 tabs, 450mg freebase DXM, which would be equivalent to 585mg hydrobromide, which is what I was always used to in the earlier phase of my dextronauting career. Not sure how much I was able to get down my gullet back in those days with a sucrets smoothie or syrup or robitussin liquigels, maybe north of 666mg hbr at most.

11:11pm - Starting to wonder if maybe it’s not the best idea to get stoned before dosing on dxm. Even though it’s just cbd oil, but I took prolly 100ml at least, enough to feel the small percentage of thc. I feel more nervous than I should be. The nerves are sobering me up, and I almost considered waiting til friday. But it could be this headache, casting the pall. I guess I’ll take an IBU. And try not to worry or overthink this too much. Hard not to though since I’m so excited. Been reading lots of trip reports and posts on the reddit forum. Shouldn’t get too twisted up about if it’s “The Right Time to Trip”. Not gonna throw the I Ching or anything. Whether it’s the perfect time or not, I’ll get it out of my system and can start thinking about something else again, get on with the regular life stuff I’ve been too heady for lately.

Popping two at a time - easypeasy, love those teeny lil barrels. Ate a small meal five hours ago. Expect to start feeling it around 12:21am [note from 12:31 - an hour is prolly normal time to kick in].

Headache starting to fade a little bit at least. Back of my neck is sore, slept weird or muscle strain maybe.

12:12am - Chatting on discord. Discord kinda sucks, would rather play hungry hungry hippos.

Still listening to youtube politics outrage machine, because it’s comforting, skipping the heavier stuff about corrupt cops and climate change, the liter stuff making fun of politicians and media figures is comforting. When the robotabs start hitting hard though, I suppose at that point I will change to more novel and poetic stimuli, the new music I haven’t heard yet that I put on a 1000+ track youtube playlist.

Doesn’t feel like the right time to be living in a music video yet, I’ll let dxm drive that timing.

12:26 - My prediction about when they would hit was wrong, although, wait a sec, now that I think about it, yeah, maybe the barest fringes. And the headache is way down, still there, but not important.

Coffee spoons, morphine grains, hourglass for the next vape. I’m not at all fucked up yet, but I can randomly be poetic at any time I want.

Yeah, here it comes: swoonytunes… except no tunes yet. I suppose I can not worry about leaning on the comfort of listening to tyt on youtube. When it becomes meaningless or absurd, I’ll switch to music, I’ll let dxm drive it. Lady Dex. I’m imagining her as a mistress tonight. A secretive affair, I don’t share this with others, except in this dissociated tumblr experiment kind of way, not even blogger anymore.

Now that it’s coming up, I’m relaxing a bit, which is unusual for the comeup. I don’t worry about eating corn chips to settle my stomach, it’s fine.

Yeah, the ride is starting, time to switch to music fo'sho. I can feel the gravity pulling. Wasn’t hard to switch to music, dxm decided for me. I hope I get one of those ego-crushing trips, but the benevolent crush, to candy dust, where you SO don’t have to do anything, it’s just done for you, AS you, you know? Who hopes who gets that?

This liquid dnb is working well, wasn’t sure for a second, now I’m getting into it, into that groove-trench, guided toward the thermal exhaust port by a Force.

Observation about my normal life occurs to me: as present tense overflows: I’m glad I have a low stress immediate family. I don’t have to worry about it being such a big deal if I break a plate or something, even if it’s fancy.

The dnb music has a propulsive effect, it’s a good dxm driving sort of energy. It really is getting harder to type, but not that much.

12:43 - It’s flowing fast now, this dnb music is helping facilitate flow - lie down swoon? I’m apportioning my stuff - my closets - my hands look and feel very weird. Maybe it’s time to go down. GONNA get deeper, try to get to the root of reality, root deep down in there.




*




—BREAK bring it:

heavy - no music video

no chat, no chels
how to plateau?
\very mirror-ring-ing

profound and e xhaust ing
reconnecting to b ody slow ly
thought about reaching out to T, C, D
of course
i would
there is that magic
it is deep - bouncing right now - alien feeling, remembering

i’m pretty lucky
it’s good to get lucky

i feel like
shrike ship character
androgynous naked writhing phasing
very very hard to type
i’m barely human, for real. :L
half chip pain ai flak

Dreading pm

The union of facets of Me.
Ego scattered through characters - star trek-