check

nullify, in nullifying

persisting in folly

desire to erase - not with a shotgun
but

maybe a psychotic break would be merciful - the thing is, this thing i'm doing is so slow, just agonizingly, analytically SLOOOOOOOOW, a nine hundred day long trainwreck

you know what we need? maybe it's just what i need, but i'll be inclusive:
EGOCIDE

dreams are ego-killer, that's why i love them so much
they don't always allow escape from ego - they do sometimes, but when they don't, they at least DISTORT ego - ergo...

daylight, pesticide - deep into the finger trap at this joint - rabid - cheese with whine - disguise - smothered under cool quilts - smothered under cool quilts - smothered under cool quilts -- if death is sleep... if death is sleep... if sleep is death...

i got connected, that was my problem - now i can't get un-connected - i guess that's the whole point of this game, the tension in the chinese finger trap - check